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Each of us is unique and different and it is clear that we will have different reasons that lead us to adopt, although all of them can be summarized in one: the desire to be a mother or father.
Wanting to fulfill ourselves as parents responds to something very instinctive, very primary. Wanting to leave something of ours here, for someone to continue our story, is hope, it is affection, it is having someone to love, to care for and who loves us and takes care of us. It is to form a family. Given this desire, adoption is one more alternative. We can reach it in different ways depending on the personal history of each one of us or simply not contemplate it.
1. Social awareness: There are parents who are considering adopting because they are very aware of the situation of children who are waiting to be assigned a family. This is usually because they have had experiences close to adoption cases: they have been adopted children, they know examples of friends or relatives, they work directly with children, they know other countries or other harsher realities, ... Having seen closely the The difficult situation of many minors who are given up for adoption and other family models makes it possible for me to consider this option in order to form my own.
2. Difficulty having a biological child: On other occasions, nature has been capricious with us and has hindered us when it comes to achieving a pregnancy because either due to lack of a partner, or because we are a same-sex couple or simply because there is some kind of organic difficulty.
Considering adoption in these cases is totally normal but it is usually accompanied by doubts and mixed feelings because we have never considered adopting before. Will I know how to do it well? Will I want it? Will you love me
In the background there is great fear, in many parents who adopt, that their child does not feel as desired or loved as if he were a biological child, that they think: 'they have adopted me because they could not'. This is one more fear of ours as parents. Why? Because we have faced a wish that has not been fulfilled and that always leads to disappointment and a grief that must be faced, accepted and overcome so that we can prepare calmly and with enthusiasm for the arrival of our child in a healthy way. It is very likely that he has similar fears and that is why he needs adults, parents, who are sure of what they do, their feelings and the decisions they make so that the child feels really protected.
Whatever the reason that led us to consider this adoption, it is perfectly valid as long as the person adopting is clear that that child is going to be his son and he his father / mother whatever happens; and that they are going to start a family. Just like with a biological child. Of course it has peculiarities: there is no pregnancy, there is a lot of bureaucracy, interviews, long waiting times, ... but any mother will tell you that no two pregnancies are the same, no two children are the same, nor are the moments the same, ...
We will also meet people who do not consider themselves capable of adopting because they think that feelings are not the same, because they believe that it is a much more complicated way of being a parent ... These arguments should not make us feel bad or sow doubts if we listen to them . We have to think that there are people who choose not to have children, who decide to dedicate their lives to religion, who prefer to live in the most remote parts of the world or who take in children without actually adopting. Fortunately we live in a world full of options.
You can read more articles similar to Why adopt a child, in the On-site Adoption category.